Jokes of the day
Which part of the hospital has the least privacy?
The ICU.
I'd tell you a joke about NAT but I would have to translate.
Why are Assembly programmers always soaking wet?
They work below C-level.
What did the customer say to the waiter?
I'm all fed up with your service.
What's it like to be kissed by a vampire?
It's a pain in the neck.
A byte walks into a bar looking miserable. The bartender asks it: "What's wrong buddy?" "Parity error." it replies. "Ah that makes sense, I thought you looked a bit off."
Knock knock. Who's there? Recursion. Recursion who? Knock knock.
What are bits?
Tiny things left when you drop your computer down the stairs.
What's the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire.
Programming is 10% science, 20% ingenuity, and 70% getting the ingenuity to work with the science.
What do you call 4 Mexicans in quicksand?
Quatro Sinko.
What kind of doctor is Dr. Pepper?
He's a fizzician.
Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France?
There was nothing but de brie.
Why was the JavaScript developer sad?
Because they didn't Node how to Express themself!
I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home. So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.
Why do they call it hyper terminal?
Too much Java.
Family-friendly jokes from JokeAPI (jokeapi.dev).
Thought of the day
“Would you rather learn to deal with the truth now than be forced to do so later on?”— Celestine Chua
“Those who are enlightened never stop forging themselves.”— Morihei Ueshiba
“The educated differ from the uneducated as much as the living differ from the dead.”— Aristotle
“All wealth is the product of labor.”— John Locke
“Heal the past, live the present, dream the future.”— Mary Engelbreit
“Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.”— Eleanor Roosevelt
“Fear is a natural reaction to moving closer to the truth.”— Pema Chodron
“Freedom lies in being bold.”— Robert Frost
“Fallacies do not cease to be fallacies because they become fashions.”— Gilbert Chesterton
“You're never too old for anything.”— Betty White
“Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know.”— Pema Chodron
“Just get out and do it. You will be very, very glad that you did.”— Christopher McCandless
Inspirational quotes provided by ZenQuotes API.
Did you know?
Two-thirds of the world’s eggplant is grown in New Jersey.
Proportional to their size, cats have the largest eyes of all mammals.
The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were named after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank Capra`s "Its A Wonderful Life."
Sherlock Holmes NEVER said “Elementary, my dear Watson”
One out of every 43 prisoners escapes from jail. 94% are recaptured.
Residents of Houston, Texas lead the U.S. in eating out - approximately 4.6 times per week.
Baby robins eat 14 feet of earthworms every day
Facts from the Useless Facts API (uselessfacts.jsph.pl).
On this day — 4 October
1943 — World War II: Allied forces executed Operation Leader, an air raid against German shipping near Bodø, Norway.Wikipedia: World War II
1941 — Willie Gillis, one of Norman Rockwell's trademark characters, debuted on the cover of The Saturday Evening Post.Wikipedia: Willie Gillis
1927 — Gutzon Borglum and approximately 400 workers began sculpting Mount Rushmore.Wikipedia: Gutzon Borglum
1925 — Great Syrian Revolt: Rebels led by Fawzi al-Qawuqji captured the city of Hama from the French Mandate of Syria.Wikipedia: Great Syrian Revolt
1918 — First World War: The Japanese merhant ship Hirano Maru was sunk by a German submarine in the Celtic Sea with the loss of 291 lives.Wikipedia: World War I1917 — First World War: The Allies devastated the German defence at the Battle of Broodseinde, prompting a crisis among German commanders and causing a severe loss of morale in the 4th Army.Wikipedia: World War I
1876 — Texas A&M University opened as the first public institution of higher education in the U.S. state.Wikipedia: Texas A&M University
1862 — American Civil War: After a naval battle in Galveston Harbor, Texas, Confederate commanders negotiated the surrender of the city to Union forces.Wikipedia: American Civil War
1633 — Smolensk War: Forces from the Polish–Lithuanian Commonwealth broke the Russian siege of Smolensk (depicted).Wikipedia: Smolensk War
1448 — Skanderbeg and Gjergj Arianiti signed a peace treaty to end the Albanian–Venetian War.Wikipedia: Skanderbeg
1363 — Red Turban Rebellions: The rebel leader Zhu Yuanzhang won the Battle of Lake Poyang by deploying ships intentionally set aflame when the emperor tried to escape.Wikipedia: Red Turban RebellionsFrom Wikipedia’s “On this day”, available under CC BY-SA 4.0.